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"S05E18 - The One with Icky Sicky
The team is in Maidenhead on ANPR duty, Lloydy and Jim follow behind a car that’s pinged the system, and manage to get to him in time to notice he’s been ‘fiddling with something’ in the car. Suspecting drugs, and possibly even dealing, the search begins. Jim suspects that a stash has gone down the guy’s trousers, so they go back to the nick for some privacy. One stash of ‘e’ later, they’re off to the custody suite to process him for dealing as it’s a sufficient quantity to be dealt. This is the second time he’s been done for dealing the stuff, and his eagerness to call his girlfriend raises further suspicions to the point that a house search follows – of the guy’s parents’ home. They are absolutely innocent, but the son most certainly is not as they find even more drugs, money and a set of scales in his bedroom.
Simon is patrolling solo in Milton Keynes and spots a car whose occupants are acting oddly. Seeing the camera in the car, the guy gives the cameraman ‘the finger’, but Simon is more concerned about his lack of insurance than his gestures. Out come all the standard excuses, one by one. Just bought the car (check), not got his documents but can produce them (check), insured on a trade policy (check). There’s also the fact that he’s trying to pretend he’s his brother, and he’s only got a provisional license – next excuse is ‘in dispute over said license as he should have a full one’. It does him no good; Simon is seizing that car.
Out in Reading with Yorkie and Dixie. A car catches their eye, and they pull it – when asked if the occupants have cannabis, they say not, until Dixie finds a joint; at which point the lads see the light and advise of the veritable shop-stock of cannabis the passenger is carrying, along with deal bags and a grinder. The guy has already been in trouble for drugs, and was handed a suspended sentence only the day before! The pair are arrested, and the cannabis carrier reacts gruesomely by vomiting something that looks worryingly red and bloody. Yorkie’s primary concern is that the dealer might have swallowed some of his merchandise, so they call in an ambulance, particularly as the guy claims to have sickle cell anaemia. The paramedic advises that the guy is probably making up the sickle cell as he’s not showing the levels of pain a sufferer would feel. It’s just the stress of being nicked.
Iestyn is out in Maidenhead, and is called in to assist with the stop of an allegedly drunk driver, in case she flees either by car or on foot. They don’t need to in the end, as she crashes on a bend. She claims to have had only a couple of glasses of wine, but her booze breath gets her nicked, followed up by the news that she’s also disqualified, so she’s got no insurance. Even if she wasn’t banned, she wouldn’t anyway because she’s nicked her boyfriend’s car!
Chris and Simon are in Milton Keynes and stop a car that they see driving erratically. Bizarrely, the car has a lot of tools lurking in odd places, but the real interest is the two bags of cannabis, and the driver admits to them. While putting the tools in the boot, as Simon organises a Street Caution, Chris finds more cannabis there! The driver insists they’re not his, so the passengers are questioned and offered a similar course of action – but it’s only when the threat of a trip to the nick is raised that a passenger claims them, and street cautions are handed out. Given that the driver has foolishly claimed the two bags at the behest of his passengers, who are very probably using him to cart them around while they deal. He gets his revenge, though, and drives off leaving the ringleader behind!
Still in Milton Keynes, Simon and Chris rush to the aid of women who have been indecently assaulted, chasing after a well-described suspect who has been located on CCTV. They find a youth who matches the description and nick him ‘on suspicion’ for questioning.
Rosie and Daz are in Chesham on ANPR duty and head off after someone who seems to have done a u-turn to avoid the cameras. They pull it over without difficulty, and find the driver is from South Africa and only has his own national license. Having been in the UK over a year, he should have a UK one – but the point is moot as he’s not insured to drive the vehicle. Interestingly, his passenger is the car’s registered keeper, but he’s banned, which suggests that the pair have swapped places after turning round. Faced with taking the complete rap, he coughs. As nobody in the car is insured to drive it, it’s seized, and brightly decorated with warning posters!"
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