by Christopher Brookmyre
Douglas Henshall stars as anti-hero Jack Parlabane in Christopher Brookmyre's play, directed by Lu Kemp.
The summer's Fringe Festival in Edinburgh is Parlabane's least favourite time of year and this time it's made worse by the fact that he's just walked straight into one of the worst conceived armed robberies he's ever had the pleasure to attend.
Three vital errors have been made with the robbery so far. Mistake No. 1: a shotgun is discharged into the ceiling to get everyone's attention.There are several hundred people outside in the shopping mall and a large police station not 200 yards away at the top of Leith Walk. Mistake No. 2: a robber gives away a fellow thief's Christian name. And finally, mistake No. 3: the robbers find themselves with at least 10 customers plus staff as hostages. One or two is usually plenty.
Caught up in the middle of this fiasco is Parlabane. He knows that bad guys get shot in the chest whilst good guys only ever get shot in the shoulder ... in the movies. And this is Scotland. And, what's more, he has company: a heavily pregnant woman; a couple of Morningside ladies; several confused post office workers; and a very frisky dog. More pressingly, Parlabane doesn't want to miss the first game of the new season and the clock is ticking...
Bampot Central features the voices of BBC Scotland's Sportsound commentators Richard Gordon, David Begg and Murdo McLeod.