A giant asteroid is heading toward Earth so some astronauts disembark from a nearby space station to blow it up. The mission is successful, and they return to the station unknowingly bringing back a gooey green substance that mutates into one-eyed tentacled monsters that feed off electricity. Soon the station is crawling with them, and people are being zapped left and right!
Robert Horton ... Commander Jack Rankin
Luciana Paluzzi ... Dr. Lisa Benson
Richard Jaeckel ... Commander Vince Elliott
Bud Widom ... General Jonathan B. Thompson
Ted Gunther ... Dr. Hans Halvorsen
David Yorston ... Lt. Curtis
Robert Dunham ... Capt. Martin
Gary Randolf ... Cordier
Jack Morris ... Lt. Morris, Rocket Pilot
Eugene Vince ... Technician
Don Plante ... Technician
Linda Hardisty ... Nurse
Richard Hylland ... Michaels
Kathy Horan ... Nurse
Ann Ault ... Nurse
There isn't a single Japanese actor in this big-budget Japanese produced sci-fi drama, but the special effects are a dead give-away. A wandering astroid (code named `Flora') is on a collision course with Earth. Richard Jackel and Robert Horton lead a team which places atomic bombs on the astroid to blow it up. They succeed, but they unwittingly bring back an alien fungus to their wheel-shaped space station. The fungus grows into man-sized monsters which multiply rapidly and overrun the space station. Jackel and Horton are forced to set aside their romantic rivalry over Luciana Paluzzi (`Thunderball') while they battle the creatures. Blazing laser guns abound in a desperate battle with the unstoppable monsters! The astronauts even don spacesuits and jet-packs for a battle on the space station's hull. All this in glorious color AND wide screen. Wow!
Sure, this sounds great but . . . well, these guys didn't know what they were doing. Or did they?
`The Green Slime' looks more like a clever satire of sci-fi movies than an ineptly made film. The odds against all the side-splitting humor in this movie happening by accident must be astronomical. The potato-shaped monster suits are hysterical. The miniatures of the rockets are so tiny the camera can barely focus on them. The dialogue sounds like perfect parodies of sci-fi's most treasured clichés. (Example: The doctor rushes up to soldiers as their about to attack a slim monster. `Stop, don't kill it!' he pleads. `This is a magnificent discovery, and we must do everything possible to SAVE it!' -- and he says it in a perfect imitation of Richard Nixon.)
When the heroes' rocket tries to outrun an atomic blast, Robert Horton orders the pilot to increase thrust. But the G-forces are already so strong, the pilot can't lift his hand to reach the throttle. Macho Robert jumps up, walks to the pilot's chair, and pushes the throttle himself!
`The Green Slime' is so full of scenes like this that it should be re-released as `National Lampoon's Space Adventure'. And just wait until you hear the Jimmy Hendrix sound-alike title theme, a psychedelic rock tune. Its was even released on 45 rpm! (That's kinda like a CD, for those of you too young to remember.)
Rent the movie, call your friends, and mix up a batch of lime Jello as a snack. This is MST3K squared.
Oh, man....I finished watching this movie a couple of hours ago and I'm still laughing hysterically when I think about it. This movie is so bad that it becomes an undeniable must for everyone who's into bad cinema. The worst possible cinema actually, this is stuff like Edward D. Wood made it. Of course, I still respect the efforts that cast and crew put into this but you can't help but roll over the floor and laugh. This is Japanese SciFi cult ( even though they used American actors, they STILL dubbed it...badly ) coming to you straight out of the era when cinema actually had evoluated a lot. But The Green Slime didn't join this trend. Prepare yourself for some amateurish cinema, yet made with a lot of love and passion for the genre.
The story is about a blob of green mucus coming straight from outer space. It got here as an uninvited visitor when some heroes destroyed an asteroide. By the way...forget about Armageddon !! The Green Slime really shows you how to blow up an big block of rock. The mucus has the ability to build itself up to green one-eyed midgets with an elephant trunk and they make adorable noises. I assure you, one look at them and you're immediately sold...these little critters stole my heart. Naturally, they don't come with good intentions !! They go after everything that is human and they suck up energy...how ? Don't bother to ask yourself that question...The "scriptwriters" didn't bother neither. In between, all the inevitable clichés aren't forgotten. So, as you can see, the special effects and costumes are next to none but it sure doesn't stop there ! Don't forget the space-station and rockets on wires, the cardboard sets and the acting that is really Oscar worthy. *cough*cough*
Finally, They're are the small but highly memorable and hilarious little aspects about it. For example, the theme song is terrific !! You'll feel the urge to buy the single of that asap since it's sooooo catchy. And a very honorable mention goes out to Robert Horton's haircut. Heck, I would give this movie a rating 10 out of 10 if only for his flawless head of hair. No matter how many helmets he puts on and off ... no matter how many dangerous stunts he has to perform, his hair remains perfectly combed all the time. Truly a haircut you can set your clock to !
Some worthless trivia to bestow. This is the very first movie ever to be shown on Mystery Science Theater 3000. Boy when you watch it you can see why. This movie screams to be made fun of. I know other people have made list reviews. Well, here's another one. It's more or less general thoughts on the movie.
-very wooden acting. Robert Horton and Richard Jackel seem to be having a contest going on about who's the stiffer actor. The guys in the monsters suits are more lively than these guys.
-Oh the monsters. I like these guys. They look like something that was designed by eight year olds. Assuming that was the target audience. For rubber Japanese monsters I thought they were fairly cool. Of course I'm a sucker for goofy aliens. They move awfully slow to be scary though.
-All the sets look like cardboard. Who knows, maybe they are.
-All the models seem as if they were made out of clearance sale craft supplies. The wires they were on even look cheap.
-the title song ROCKS! I've had it stuck in my head for the past few days. Imagine the looks I get in Wal-Mart buying milk singing "The green sliiiiimmmmmme. The green slliiiimmmeeeee." I need to find a copy of that song. It's better than the whole movie.
Funny, goofy B movie. Yet another I recommend for a 'bad movie night.'